Saturday, May 29, 2010

Digital Tuesday - Cute People

Today's card uses The Greeting Farm's digi images of Wild Sprouts Ebony, both the "regular" version and the dressy version. I love Ebony - I think she reminds me of myself... funky and maybe a little goth but still girlie. :) Anyway, I made this card for the

Digital Tuesday - Cute People challenge


I used mostly SU! cardstock, DP, and markers in Pumpkin Pie and Not Quite Navy but also used my Prismacolor colored pencils blended with Gamsol. As you probably know by now, I am completely addicted to adding glittery eye shadow to my characters, and Ebony was no exception.

I can't believe it's Saturday! I cannot believe a whole week has gone by - it's been such a blur. We are having our big annual Memorial Day cookout on Sunday (hello?!? TOMORROW!!!!) and we haven't done a damn thing to prepare for it yet. Jeremy's mom has been in town for the funeral of her nephew Todd (Jeremy's cousin), so we've been busy with her for the last few days. Last night we were taken to dinner with her family - 18 of us - and it was a more than 3-hour dinner. It was really nice, though, since we don't see any of them very often. Todd's sister Tracy lives in Marin County, California, and I do believe this was the first time that we had actually met - she's really nice. She has 3 little kids who were angels throughout all of the calling hours/services and dinners. And we chatted a bit about us moving to California...

I'm not sure I can do it. Jeremy and I talked a little more about it yesterday and I am starting to think it's not going to happen - not this year, anyway. Cassidy is very upset about it and does not want to move at all. She's at a really tough age - 15 - and I understand. I have been having a rough time with it, too, but I have been trying to keep it to myself because if it's what is best for our family, then I'll make the necessary sacrifices. But I have to admit that I was sitting in my yard for a few minutes yesterday just enjoying the sunshine, and as I sat there, I started thinking "this might be our last annual Memorial Day party..." and then I started thinking about leaving my sister, my cousin Angela, my friends... Missy and I went and got pedicures yesterday and went to Walmart. I hate shopping alone. Who am I going to shop with if I'm 3000 miles away? I know I'll make new friends, I'm a very social person - but I've got tears rolling down my face just typing this. This really sucks, actually. I absolutely love California - but I wish we could move our family and all of Cassidy's and my friends with us... LOL

Another thing that has really made me think twice about the move is my friend Melanie passing away last week - I really needed to be around my friends, to hug them and feel their love and support. I'm an extremely emotional and sensitive person and I just cannot imagine being across the country if something like this happened again - and let's face it, none of us are getting any younger and tragedies and deaths will happen. So will marriages, births, and joyous events - and I want to be a part of them with my friends!

My head has been spinning for weeks and I just want it to stop. My job is miserable and I was really looking forward to giving my notice, but I also love the people I work with and I am very leery of giving up my financial independence. Jeremy is a wonderful husband and father - but he's not great with money. For me to give up being the primary breadwinner and insurance provider would be a huge leap of faith - and I would end up angry and resentful if it didn't work out. I talked to Jeremy about this the other day and I think it made him really think - this isn't like him being 22 years old and just going out there without a care in the world, knowing he could come back if he wanted to... this would be uprooting our family, our lives, and starting over again 3000 miles away from everyone and everything that we know. It's scary. We still haven't made up our minds 100% yet. Jeremy will be disappointed if we don't go, but he does want what's best for all of us in the long run. Trevor will be very disappointed if we don't go, but I do think staying here for at least his last year of high school would be what is best for him. I told him he can certainly go stay out there for the summer if that's what he wants to do, and that once he graduates high school and turns 18, he can make his own decisions (with guidance from us, of course). So much to consider - and the bottom line (for me, anyway) is that we either go in July/August, or we don't go until Cassidy at least graduates from high school. So much to consider and as usual, I will of course let you all know once we've really made a decision. Wish me luck.

Sooooo - yeah - good times. On top of it all, I have raging PMS - fun! Not. ;) Jeremy and I are leaving soon to drive his mom to TF Green airport in Rhode Island, and then we are hitting the Super Walmart and getting ready for our big bash tomorrow. We will then come home and start cleaning/cooking and getting the yard ready... and before you know it, tomorrow will be here. And that's another thing - I am still struggling with life going on without Mel. I know it sounds silly, but it's true. I feel a little guilty - how can we celebrate when our friend is gone? But you know what? Mel would have WANTED us to celebrate - to celebrate her life, her soul, her bravery... and I certainly think we all need a day of fun after all the sadness. I'm really looking forward to it. But I won't lie - I really wish Mel would be here. :( Maybe we'll see a yellow butterfly - I hope so. That would just be so cool (did I tell you about the yellow butterflies? LOL A giant one buzzed around me, Jeremy and our friend Missy the day of Mel's funeral - we later found out it happened to 2 or 3 other people that day and has continued to happen - butterflies don't normally interact with people, do they? LOL)

Last - it's Memorial Day weekend - please remember the vets who gave their lives for you and this country. This is the first Memorial Day without Jeremy's grandpa being with us, and Trevor has talked about him a lot this week - his birthday would have been last weekend, too. We miss him a lot - but we keep his memory alive by talking about him quite often, which is nice. We have nothing but good memories - what more can you really ask for?

Hope you all have a great long weekend - remember to tell the people you love what they mean to you, you just never know what tomorrow will bring. Peace.

2 comments:

  1. Hi Jenn what a super cutie this one is those 'sprouts' look gorgeous I am loving this so much thank you for joining us at Digital Tuesday this week.
    Hugs
    Lorraine x

    ReplyDelete
  2. oh Jenn, it doesn't get much cuter than this!!! Fabulous!!!
    Thank you for joining us @ Digital Tuesday!
    blessings!

    ReplyDelete